You will end up with someone who loves you and who you love, but that love will not be your true love, if that was the word to use, because you can never be with your true love. At least that was what my mother and grandmother told me.
You see, what we understand about real love is that deep passion and connection you instantly have with someone but it is not the good kind of love that will last. This kind of emotion, although feels like love, or is so called love, only creates deep passion, lust and dangerous desires like a burning flame. What happens when you walk into a bonfire? You burn!
The one person that can really hurt you and your soul is someone you so lust and desire that forces you to do thing you’ve never imagine doing. That ‘love’ is so strong that it does not create gentle touch but something so electric that construes with your brain in believing that it is something good.
Real ‘love’ is the only kind of love that will hurt you to the point of no return which is why, according to my mother and grandmother, the person who you therefore end up with is someone that connects to you in a different way that might not exactly feel like love as it is not as lustful or infatuated. It might not feel electric like it was but it will be something that can last.
But I want the kind of love that consumes me, or so I thought.
There’s a fine line between lust and love, if that is even the right word to use – love. We are more drawn to the lust that brings out our jealousy, anger, passion and desire that seemed as if it was love. It is more addictive but never good. Which is why this type of relationship with too strong of a desire cannot last.
Of course when I first heard this I strongly disagree. How can you be with someone you don’t desire or lust for so deeply that you cannot pull yourself away, if not that then what do you feel?
It all makes sense to me after experiencing both kinds of ‘connection’.
Like a moth to a flame, deep desires get you hurt. And I’m not talking about the kind of pain that makes you angry and lonely, but the pain that tears you to your soul and unlike how wounds heal, this is pretty much unmendable. The love that makes you blind is not the kind of love that can last. You forget who you’ve become and most of the time you won’t like yourself from it. You won’t realize it, obviously, but when you do, even then it’s hard to walk away from.
But only through this pain will you find the right kind of connection. The one that does not burn but heals. The one that does not blind but helps you see who you want to be. That’s the kind of love that will last and that’s the right way to love.
And so I end with this song
