“It’s like pizza, it’s good when it’s cold and better when it’s warm!”
In this century, women enjoy talking about and having sex as much as men do. Although men resort to porn, women resort to X-rated films or soft porn films like 9 Songs, Fifty Shades of Grey or Basic Instincts cause let’s face it, films are made to look realistic and porn is just an exaggeration of men’s fantasy.
Generally men hold the relationship-card most of the time while women hold the sex-card. But that’s a whole different topic.
My girlfriends and I enjoy discussing our sex lives amongst each other to learn new tips, judge each other’s partners (but never each other), exchange ideas and… it’s an endless conversation. But here’s some that I find helpful both to please us and our partners.
Think of it as a film. Where and when you want the action to go down can be planned ahead of time. Personally, I love being high on a building, overlooking the city while your body is pressed against the cold glass window. You feel like you are in your own movie and the whole world is watching (probably and most likely not, but who cares).
Good sex comes with a price. Yup! Setting the mood right can cost variously from starting off with a good dinner, buying expensive lingerie (I mean, let’s face it, we buy them for ourselves most of the time), deluxe suite for a change of place, the right playlist and the list goes on.
Tease to be please. That saying of how “you give to take”, giving a good tease means you’ll be getting good sex. The built up is important, just like a movie where there has to be some sort of rising action to reach the climax, leave some breadcrumbs around to lead them to you hidden treasure.
Sex with an ex. Although, I do not recommend this if one of you are in a serious relationship, sex with an ex is just an easy comfy feeling that guarantees a good, predictable ending. Who knows, you might find out new things you haven’t known before (in both good and bad). Plus, Cougar Town made a song out of it.
Music is everything. You can be a hip-hop lover, rock, pop, techno, whatever, music is made to be enjoyed at any given moment. My suggestion? Keep a sex playlist and you can bump and grind’ however you want. Although, side note, there should be mutual likings on the genre. Not everyone enjoys heavy metal while sensually getting it on with someone.
In the end, just do what would please you! If you can’t figure that out yourself, much less give them clues, you’ll be hoping for a miracle that your partner would figure that out on their own. So be creative and enjoy the ride, because you should be riding it. And remember, don’t be lazy!
